


Perchance to Dream

by Merzibelle



Series: Collective Dreaming [2]
Category: Torchwood
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-29
Updated: 2013-06-29
Packaged: 2017-12-16 13:20:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,941
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/862471
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Merzibelle/pseuds/Merzibelle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the events of Journey's End, Jack finds himself struggling to accept that his return to Torchwood Three, Cardiff, and, most especially, Ianto, is real. Has he truly, finally died or is this just a particularly vivid dream?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Perchance to Dream

**Author's Note:**

> Author's Notes: This is an old story that I am importing here in order to have all my stories in one archive. It was originally published on Dreamwidth under the name Beth McCombs.
> 
> Disclaimer: Torchwood is ©2006-2009 British Broadcasting Service Wales (BBC Wales). Created by Russell T. Davies. Produced by Russell T. Davies and Julia Gardner. Doctor Who is ©1963-1989 Britsh Broadcasting Service (BBC), ©1996 British Broadcasting Service (BBC), Universal Television, and Fox Network, ©2005-2009 British Broadcasting Service Wales (BBC Wales). Doctor Who was relaunched in 2005 by Russell T. Davies. Produced by Russell T. Davies and Julia Gardner. Copyrighted material is used without permission of the BBC with no intention of profit from the works contained herein.
> 
> Original Publication/Copyright: 14 June 2009

**  
Perchance to Dream**

_To sleep, perchance to dream. Ay, there’s the rub! For in that sleep of death what dreams may come._ _\--Hamlet (III, i, 72-74)_

**Prologue**

“Slow down, Jack…”

“Can’t.” Jack silenced Ianto with a kiss. His hands shook too much to take the time to fully unbutton his lover’s shirt. He grasped the edges of the shirt and tugged, scattering buttons around the office. “I need this, Ianto. Too often I've come so close to you only to be dragged back to life." He nuzzled against Ianto’s neck. “Don’t want to lose this dream.”

“It’s not a dream.” Ianto’s hands caught his wrists, pulling his hands away to intertwine their fingers. “We’re together. I promise.”

Jack put his arms around Ianto, pulling the other man’s hands behind his back, and, blindly, he grabbed the already discarded tie, wrapping it around Ianto’s wrists to secure them out of the way. He stroked his hands over the Welshman’s pale skin, once again memorizing Ianto for when all he had were memories.

Jack sank a hand into Ianto’s hair, pulled his head back and kissed him. With his other arm he lifted Ianto onto the desk behind him, sweeping papers and artifacts out of the way to lay his lover out before him. He kissed his way down Ianto’s chest, leading the way with his fingers, undoing belt and flies, stripping fabric off Ianto as quickly as he could. He had to have Ianto naked beneath him, had to have him wrapped around him, nothing else would satisfy him.

He growled softly, shrugging out of his coat, and groped for the lube, silently hoping it was still in the top drawer of the desk. Everything else was the same as those ages ago moments, why shouldn’t this be? His fingers closed around the small bottle. Jack tossed it onto the desk and shrugged out of his own clothes.

“Untie me, Jack.” Ianto’s voice was rough with arousal, yet still strangely accepting. “Let me touch you.”

Jack blinked. Then he realized what he’d done. Tying Ianto like that had to hurt. Quickly, he reached for his lover, pulling him up to sit on the edge of the desk, and gently kissed him in apology. He broke the kiss the peer over Ianto’s shoulder in order to untie him without hurting him further. “Sorry. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have…”

“Shh…” Ianto turned his head, leant back a bit and kissed Jack. “You forgot everything but me. I’m not going to complain about that.” As soon as he was free, he wrapped his arms around Jack, stroking stray strands of hair back, and smiled. “Still, we should take this downstairs, Cariad.” He slipped off the desk, taking Jack’s hand in his and led him to the hatchway.

“Ianto…” Jack hated the whine in his voice, but he dreaded even more letting go of Ianto for even the second or two it would take to descend the ladder. He was so certain if he let go for even an instant, this wonderful moment would be over. “I…”

“Trust me, Jack.”

Jack didn’t trust his voice, just stared at Ianto and tightened his hold on the Welshman’s hand.

Ianto brought his free hand up, curling it around Jack’s jaw, and stroked Jack’s lower lip with his thumb. Pulling gently, he brought their lips together for a barely there kiss. “Trust me, Jack, I’m not leaving you. Now come downstairs and make love to me.”

How could he deny that request? Jack slowly released Ianto. He took a half step back to allow Ianto an easier descent into his bunker. He thought for a moment, and then twisted, reaching back to the desk to grab the bottle of lube off it. “Might need this. I can’t remember if there’s any down there.” A warm chuckle was his answer.

“Have you ever known me to be unprepared for anything, Jack?”

Jack laughed. It felt so good to laugh again. He leant over the hatchway to toss the bottle down to Ianto. “It has been a very long time. Just be glad I did remember to get it. I need you so bad.” He watched Ianto catch the bottle before he slid down the ladder.

“Then take me.”

Jack’s breath caught in his throat at the statement. That rich rough voice, accent thicker with arousal, it just shot straight to his already aching cock, hardening it further. He turned and almost dropped his jaw in shock. Never in all their far too short years together had Ianto been as confident in bed as to make such a blunt statement or lay so open before him.

“God, Ianto,” Jack growled, as he crawled up the bed and covered Ianto’s body with his own. “Look at you, all laid out like my own personal buffet.” He propped himself over Ianto on one arm, the brush of his lover’s skin against his own drawing a deep moan from his throat. Jack slipped a hand beneath Ianto. Smooth skin slipped over his calloused fingers. “I don’t even know where to start.”

The answering chuckle was broken by a cry as Jack breached Ianto with a single finger. He raised a brow on discovering Ianto already relaxed and ready for him. One part of his mind immediately went back to the thought that this was a particularly vivid dream… he’d wake any minute… the rest growled at the first, too tempted by the sight, feel and smell of naked aroused Ianto to focus on anything but reclaiming this man who’d so long kept his heart safe.

He had to have him. Now. Everyone and everything else could wait. Jack knew only one thing, one hunger, a desperate need to be buried as deep in his lover as he could get, until he had no idea where he ended and Ianto began. He aligned his cock with Ianto’s entrance with one hand, the other sinking into Ianto’s hair, holding him steady. Jack claimed Ianto’s mouth in a deep searching kiss even as he thrust deep into the younger man’s body. He smothered Ianto’s cry in the kiss. Groaned into it himself as Ianto’s body clamped down on him in response to the sudden intrusion.

Jack broke the kiss, panting for breath, and rested his forehead on Ianto’s so he could stare into those beautiful blue eyes, so dark with passion as to border on black. With one hand, he brought Ianto’s leg up over his hip, silently encouraging him to wrap himself around Jack. He needed this. To feel Ianto all around him for however long this moment of paradise lasted. Everything became a blur, a blend of memory and need. Sharing panted breath, the wet heat of kisses, tight heat wrapped around him, passionate cries echoing throughout the small room. He retained just enough sense to insure Ianto’s pleasure as much as his own. Jack reached between them and stroked Ianto’s cock in counterpoint to his own hard thrusts.

It had been too long for either of them to last very long. Ianto’s back arched. His nails dug into Jack’s shoulders as he came with a hoarse scream, come splattering over Jack’s hand to coat both their stomachs. Jack hissed in a breath in reaction… the pain in his back from the drag of Ianto’s nails, the tight clasp of Ianto’s passage on his cock… the simple sound of Ianto screaming his name… it all combined to throw him over the edge with a desperate scream of his own. He dropped onto Ianto, barely retaining enough sense to catch himself before his full weight settled on his lover. “Ianto… Oh God, Ianto…” he breathed against Ianto’s neck, pressing kisses to the sweaty skin, “if this is another dream, don’t let me wake up.”

**Chapter One**

It was the chill on his back that woke him. Such a sharp contrast to the warm body snuggled against his chest. Jack absently reached for the covers then froze, realization dawning on him. It had been millennia since he’d been able to actually reach for something with his own hands. He dragged in a steadying breath and slowly opened his eyes. Then he wrinkled his nose to avoid a sneeze as Ianto shifted causing his hair to rub against his nose. He closed his eyes again, dragging in a deep breath full of their blended scents, and slowly, consciously relaxed his suddenly tense body. Muscle by muscle, inch by inch, he forced himself to relax in preparation for easing out of Ianto’s possessive hold. It was an achingly familiar routine, one he’d followed every morning for a bit more than two years, and even now Ianto’s more asleep then awake grumbles of protest brought a smile to his lips.

Slowly, Jack eased off the narrow cot, hissed in a breath when his bare feet hit the freezing concrete, and tugged the covers up over Ianto. He watched Ianto sleep for a moment just in case the other man woke, but he only pulled Jack’s pillow close with a sleepy growl. Jack shook his head, barely refraining from laughing, and headed off to shower. If this was a vivid dream, he could accept waking now. He’d had one more glorious night in Ianto’s arms.

Hot water, so hot the needle fine spray stung and scalded him. He rested his hands on the tiled wall of the shower and just let the water beat down on his skin. Next to Ianto, this was the one thing he’d missed the most in four plus billion years of being just a giant head. _I know they said I had an ego, but that was taking ‘swelled head’ way too far._ Still, he’d survived, watched his children and his children’s children live, love and grow until the inevitable day he was the only one of his so-called species remaining. His tears mingled with the water. His chest heaved with silent sobs. Jack dragged in a breath, desperate to regain his calm, and forced himself to straighten and reach for the soap.

“How long have you been in here?”

The sleep roughened whisper ghosted over his ear sending a shiver across his skin. Strong arms encircled him. Soft lips pressed to his nape. Jack leaned his head back against Ianto’s shoulder, a ragged breath escaping him. “Not long enough,” he breathed, even as he turned to face Ianto. “Not nearly long enough.”

“Let me take care of you,” Ianto murmured. His hands stroked over Jack’s back in long soothing caresses, silently urging Jack closer to him, culminating in one hand cupping the back of Jack’s head and pushing it down onto Ianto’s shoulder. “You’re not alone anymore, Cariad. Let me…” his words trailed off into silence.

Jack half-sobbed as he wrapped himself up in Ianto and Ianto’s reassuring touches. He wrapped his arms around his lover’s waist, buried his nose in the tight curls behind Ianto’s ear, and pressed a kiss to the sensitive skin there in quiet thanks. He let the tears come, cried for millennia’s of losses, clutched Ianto close as he thought of the children he’d lost before they’d even become old enough to communicate with him. A shudder worked its way through his body at the thought of the thousands lost to Bliss in New New York, the hundreds lost to the Macra on the Motorway. He could do nothing. He’d not felt so helpless in centuries. Then, the Doctor swooped in, gave them the necessary escape, and finally, his own.

Slowly, Ianto’s soft humming penetrated Jack’s mind. Rummaging through his mind for the name of the ancient song distracted him from his macabre thoughts. Slowly, a smile crept onto his lips. It was their song. Slowly, as the memory became clearer, he began to sing softly in Ianto’s ear, “When you're lyin' here in my arms… I'm findin' it hard to believe… We're in heaven…” He lifted his head from Ianto’s shoulder, brushed his lips over the younger man’s, and murmured, “Don’t wake me up, Ianto. Please.”

“Oh, Jack…”

**Chapter Two**

The rich scent of dark roast coffee teased his nose. Once again, he sipped and all but moaned in pleasure. Centuries of trying and he still didn’t know what magic it was that made Ianto’s coffee so unique. “Missed this.” Jack toasted Ianto with his coffee mug. It was his striped coffee mug right down to the chip in the handle from when Owen had accidently shot it with the Singularity Scalpel. “No one ever made coffee as wonderful as yours.”

“Just the coffee?” Ianto’s subtle smirk gave lie to the serious tone of the question. “Well, then, I’ll just…” He turned and took a few small steps toward the office door.

“Ianto!” He reached out, grabbed Ianto’s wrist and tugged him down into his lap. “You know I missed you, too.” He rescued Ianto’s mug before the other man’s coffee spilled. Jack reached behind Ianto to set their mugs down then cupped Ianto’s face in his hands, kissing him lightly. “I have missed you so much.” He shook his head, dragged in a steadying breath, and nodded to the desk beside them. “I missed your birthday. “

“No, you didn’t.” Ianto smiled as he rose to his feet and retrieved his coffee. “It was yesterday. Today’s 20 August 2011.”

“One year and one day from…” Jack shook his head. “Never mind. So, tell me about this.” He waved his own coffee mug at the windows which overlooked the Hub.

“What do you want to know?”

“Everything.” Jack rose, circled the desk to reach the open doorway of his office. He leaned on the frame. “It’s like nothing’s changed. And yet, you’re different… even more confident then I remember. So tell me what’s happened while I’ve been…” Jack paused trying to figure out the best word to use. Finally, he settled on the totally inadequate, but still strangely appropriate considering the paperwork littering the desk behind him and the scene before him, “away.”

Jack rolled his spine along the doorframe, slowly turning to face Ianto, and sipped at his coffee. Even going cold, it was delicious. _God, it was even better than he remembered_. He watched while Ianto began to roll down his sleeves, doing up his cuffs, in between sips of coffee. “Well?” Jack asked, raising an eyebrow in question.

“I’m trying to think of where to begin.” Ianto turned to rest one hip on the desk. A familiar position from when they were taking a break while working late. The young man stared off into the distance. An almost uncomfortable silence fell in the room.

“How about with why here? Why Cardiff and the Hub?” Jack asked, unable to take Ianto’s silence any longer. He dropped his gaze for a moment, and then lifted it again to stare intently at Ianto. “Why are you here waiting for me and not with Lisa?”

“Because this is where we were happiest. I was…” Ianto swallowed, obviously disturbed by what he was about to say, and continued only after he’d taken a very deep breath. “All of us, really, were offered a choice. Or several choices as the case may be. The same decision you’ll need to make.” He looked away, biting his lip, and Jack crossed the room in three brisk strides to cup Ianto’s cheek in his hand.

“Ianto?” Jack gently grasped Ianto’s chin, tilting his face up to look at him. He brushed away the tears glittering on those long dark lashes. “Talk to me.”

“I love you, Jack. And I loved her.” Ianto pulled away. Turned his back to Jack and wrapped his arms around himself. Jack stepped closer, rested a hand low on his back, and, when he wasn’t shrugged off, slipped his arms around Ianto’s waist. “I knew what you were like and hoped we’d…” Ianto trailed off, but Jack understood the thought.

“You were hoping that she and I could develop at least a friendship. You probably even hoped for more, so you wouldn’t have to make a choice between us.” Ianto nodded. Jack could feel the echoes of Ianto’s pain and tightened his hold in response. “So what did happen?”

“Even here, she was more machine than human.” Ianto’s words became softer and softer as each slipped between his lips. “She wasn’t my Lisa anymore. She didn’t want me, only wanted the army, conquest… and when the time came, she chose the Cybermen.”

There was nothing he could say in response. So he did what he did best, spoke without words by turning Ianto toward him and holding him tight. He swayed gently, absently humming their song, in a vain attempt to comfort his lover. He made it through two repetitions before Ianto drew in a breath and straightened.

“This isn’t answering your questions.” Ianto pulled from the embrace and grabbed for their abandoned mugs. He stalked decisively for the coffee machine. “Plus, the others will be here soon.”

“Which others?” The abrupt movement and subject change started Jack. He whirled about to follow Ianto. “Ianto, who is on the team?”

“Myself, Tosh, Tommy, Owen and his Katie.” Ianto offered the refilled mug to Jack. He leaned back against the counter while he sipped at his own. “The confidence you commented on earlier comes from my having to lead while we waited for you.”

“No Gwen? Or Suzie?” Jack just stared at Ianto in disbelief. If there were ever two people he would have expected to find here, it would have been one or both of those women. “I mean…”

“I know what you mean. Suzie didn’t believe. She saw only the dark.” Ianto half-shrugged, reached into a nearby drawer, and pulled out a mini chocolate bar he tossed up to a circling Myfanwy. “As for Gwen, she’s a desk sergeant now. Has two adorable kids with a third on the way.” He nodded to a picture tacked to a corkboard just beyond the kitchenette.

“So you see her then?” Jack wandered over to the board taking in the pictures. In addition to the one of Gwen, Rhys and their kids, there were pictures of a smiling Owen, his arms wrapped around a blonde woman. From the attire, Jack figured it was a wedding picture. There was Toshiko, laughing in Tommy’s arms. It was strange to see Tommy in twenty-first century casual wear. But there were no pictures of Ianto. That was even stranger. “What about you?”

“On occasion…” Ianto shrugged. He turned from Jack and started the coffee brewing for the rest of what was apparently his team. “No reason for me to be on there.”

Jack blinked at the resigned tone in Ianto’s voice. He looked from the Welshman to the photographs and back. That didn’t make any sense at all. If he was commanding the team, shouldn’t he too be on this photo wall? Jack opened his mouth to question only to have his words drowned out by the proximity alarms and the clang of the cage door opening to admit Toshiko.

**Chapter Three**

“Jack!”

Toshiko’s arms wrapped around his neck almost strangling him in her exuberance but he didn’t care. She was warm, soft and oh so alive in his arms. He could still feel the heavy limp weight of her in his arms, could vividly remember his last sight of her. Not the video she’d left behind but the faint smile she’d given him as the light faded from her eyes.

“Toshiko,” he whispered her name and rubbed his cheek on her hair. Loose strands tickled his nose while he breathed deep of the light floral scent of her shampoo. He pulled slowly back, smiling down at her, and stroked his hands down her arms to clasp her hands in his. He felt something unfamiliar, a ring if his questing fingers identified it properly. “You look beautiful.” Jack lifted her hand and grinned. “Is this what I think it is?”

Her blushing smile was far more telling than her soft, barely audible yes. “Congratulations,” he whispered kissing her cheek. “Do I need to subtly threaten your fiancé?”

“Jack!” Her playful smack made him laugh. It was so good to see her laugh, to see her glowing with happiness. If anyone on his old team deserved to be happy, Toshiko did. “No threats needed. Ianto already did that.”

“Of course I did. I couldn’t allow anyone to harm you.” Ianto’s arm reached over his shoulder, handing a cup of coffee to Toshiko. “And may I add my congratulations to his?”

“Always.” Toshiko accepted both the cup and Ianto’s gentle kiss. Jack raised an eyebrow in response to that move. Never in a billion years would he have imagined Ianto kissing Toshiko with all the implied intimacy of the gesture, even if it was the merest brush of their lips together. “So has he…?” Toshiko trailed off as Ianto gave a quick shake of his head.

“Ah.” Toshiko cradled her cup in her hands. “I should get to work.”

“Where is Tommy?” Ianto asked with a nod and, thereby, saved Jack from stupidly asking who she was engaged to. “I would have thought…”

“Parking.” Toshiko put her cup down, donned her glasses, and started typing away. Jack still had trouble with the incongruity of the familiar actions from so long ago blended with the changes he saw in his old team. “I wanted to see Jack.”

Jack shook his head with a laugh. He almost made a flirtatious remark about always yearning to see him, but managed to keep it back in favor of watching the twosome’s body language. Ianto was unusually tense, a subtle tension, yet it was there, as he stood by Toshiko’s shoulder watching her type away and occasionally quietly commenting on the data scrolling by on the monitors. Jack wondered about the source of the tension as it hadn’t been there before Toshiko’s aborted question; however, before he could ask, the door alarm sounded again.

Taking a few steps away, Jack left the other two to their discussion of whatever project Toshiko was working on for Ianto in favor of seeing who was coming in next. Tommy came in first laughing over his shoulder at whatever comment Owen was making as the medic followed him into the Hub. The duo immediately split up. Tommy passing Jack with a nod, his focus more on Toshiko which was perfectly all right with Jack, while Owen headed straight for the medical bay with little more than a wave in Jack’s general direction.

Disturbed, Jack followed Owen. He remembered all too clearly Owen’s reactions to both his resurrection post Abbadon and his return from The Year that Never Was, so this casual acceptance of his presence just didn’t mesh with Jack’s memories. He leaned on the chain link making up the observation area’s upper railing and propped a foot on the lower bar. “Owen…”

“Look, we don’t need to do that whole ‘it’s good to see you, missed you’ crap, do we?”

Owen’s grousing caused Jack to shake his head with a laugh. Now that was the Owen he remembered so well. “I just wanted to see you. Been hugged to death by Toshiko, wondered what you’d do…”

“First, I’m going to bitch because my coffee’s late, then I’m going to autopsy this weevil.” Owen turned away and tossed his jacket over the desk chair. “You’ll flirt with everyone and totally distract Teaboy, so my coffee’s even later and letting me bitch some more.” Owen looked up and grinned at Jack. “It’s another day at Torchwood, Jack, that’s all. Just don’t flirt with my wife.”

“Wife?” Jack blinked a couple of times. He couldn’t have just heard Owen mentioning a wife. Yeah, that picture seemed like a spontaneous wedding shot, but still. Gwen was clearly with Rhys. Suzie didn’t seem to exist anymore. So who in the hell could he have married? “You have a wife?”

“Yeah.” Owen turned around again. The smile on his face was so unexpected. It lit up Owen in ways Jack had never seen even during his brief affair with Diane Holmes. “I married Katie three years ago. Ianto was best man.”

Jack shook his head. Everything was confused. He did know, well, remember, one thing very clearly. Ianto wouldn’t have known Owen when Owen was with Katie so… “How was Ianto your best man? He never even met…”

“Look, it’s complicated.” Owen pointed over Jack’s shoulder to the archway. “You want answers, ask Teaboy. That’s his job anyway. Let me get back to mine, eh?”

“Fine, I’ll talk to Ianto.” Jack pointed at Owen. “But no snide remarks because your coffee’s even later. You sent me to him."

**Chapter Four**

“Ianto!” Jack went bounding out of the medical bay headed for his office. He completely ignored Owen’s parting shot of Jack’s instructions not stopping him from grousing at Ianto. “My office. We need to talk.”

“Of course, Jack.”

Jack headed into the office, momentarily confused by the quick looks that passed between Ianto, Tommy and Toshiko. He shook off the confusion and sprawled into his desk chair. He propped his feet on one corner of the desk and pointed imperiously at the chair opposite. “So, I hear you were best man at Owen’s wedding.”

“Yup.” Ianto’s expression went distant for a few moments. He was clearly remembering something that both made him happy yet sad at the same time. “Kate’s a good friend. They make a lovely couple.” Ianto shook himself, glanced over at Jack, and sighed. “She runs the tourist office for us. She makes a wonderful public face for Torchwood.”

“How did you hook up with him again?” Jack dropped his feet to the floor, twisted about and rested his elbows on the desk. “I mean, I know you didn’t know Owen when he knew Katie. You’d have been just out of your teens, drifting, maybe just starting to work at Canary Wharf. So, this…” He waved his hand between where Ianto was sitting and the office windows in the vague direction of the medical bay. “This doesn’t make logical sense.”

Ianto sat for a moment. Completely silent for so long that Jack began to wonder if he had to order the young man to speak to him. Then a smile drifted across Ianto’s lips. A surprisingly happy smile, which in Jack’s memory was so rare that he treasured every one he’d ever received long after the clear memories of exactly what brought most of those smiles out had faded into vague misty images. Finally, just as Jack was opening his mouth again, Ianto spoke.

“I found Tosh first. Or maybe she found me.” Ianto rose to his feet. Jack watched as his lover paced for a moment before stopping by the window. He leaned an arm on the glass and stared out into the Hub. Jack frowned as he realised that tension was back; it echoed from every taut line of Ianto’s body. “The best explanation is that we found each other, as we both got to the Hub at the same moment. Me from my London after Lisa made her choice and Tosh from hers in order to avoid the MOD disaster.”

In the reflection of the glass, Jack caught Ianto’s smile. That smile he recognized. It was the ‘remembering good sex’ smile. He’d pay good money, or even not so good money, to get a glimpse at the thoughts hidden behind it.

“We had quite the reunion,” Ianto chuckled. Then he turned back to Jack. “Tried our codes and found this place looking as if we’d never left. Started it back up…” he shrugged. “We decided to wait for you. What’s Torchwood without her commander?”

“And Owen?” Jack prompted.

“He called me.” Ianto half-shrugged. “It was a very inopportune moment to call, but he rang my cell. After a few minutes bantering, and more than a few insults, to establish that we really were who we said we were, he asked for a job.”

“And you gave him one?”

“Well, I made him suffer a bit for his timing, but yeah.”

Jack just shook his head. He had so many questions that he didn’t even know where to begin. Besides, the mere thought of Ianto and Toshiko together, all dark hair and pale skin, completely ruined his ability to think straight as all the blood rushed from his brain to his cock. “I’m sure you did.” He swallowed hard and grabbed for his cooling coffee to try to cover up the strangled sound of his voice.

“Well, you know me, Jack.” The visual confirmation of his audible smirk was hidden behind the coffee mug Ianto was still occasionally sipping from.

He stared at Ianto over the rim of his cup. Jack could almost see the threads of Ianto’s thoughts as the young man shifted ideas about in his head. It was clear to Jack he wanted to speak about something important, but wasn’t sure how to start the discussion. He tossed off the dregs of the coffee and offered the cup to Ianto. He opened his mouth to ask Ianto another question, hoping to get the conversation going again when Torchwood’s infamous timing struck.

“Ianto! Jack!” Toshiko’s called from the main Hub. “Weevil alert. There’s a pair of them. One’s in Splott. The other’s in Bute Park.”

“Owen, Tommy, take the SUV, get the one in Splott.” Jack looked over at Ianto with a grin. “Ianto with me. We’ll take the park.”

**Chapter Five**

It took hours to chase down that single Weevil. Jack found himself grinning with pleasure as they ran after the creature, ducking down alleyways and through abandoned warehouses until they finally cornered the alien in yet another ruined warehouse. With hand signals and shared smiles, they split up, falling back into their old routine as if their last hunt together had been just yesterday not eons ago.

Jack watched Ianto move. The uncanny ability he had to walk nearly soundlessly in any environment, regardless of what he was wearing, working to his advantage as he crept closer to the Weevil. The Weevil itself looked between them warily, head swinging back and forth, before seeming to decide that Jack was the greater threat. It launched at him with a growl. Jack swung, hit it in the jaw, and hissed in pain. _Damn, forgot how hard their bones were!_

Soon he was grappling with the Weevil, throwing punches and struggling to keep it from his throat. Yet, even as he fought with the creature, he was laughing. This was the most alive he’d felt since two thousand ten when his world crashed around him in one brokenly whispered sentence from Gwen. The memory crashed through his mind. The still aching emptiness of that moment distracting him for just long enough for the Weevil to take him down. Growling, it bared its teeth aggressively before clamping down on his throat.

_Fuck!_ He screamed in his mind though only a strangled sound escaped his compressed throat. Jack scrabbled for the sedative spray with one hand while the other attempted to pry the alien off him. A grunt from the Weevil accompanied the tearing of his own skin as Ianto tackled the creature away from him. Jack cried out in pain. Then, he rolled to his feet and whirled about to find Ianto holding the Weevil away from himself while shooting it full of sedatives. The pair crashed down onto the floor, Weevil on top, and Ianto’s head cracked sickeningly against the concrete.

“No!” He shoved the Weevil off Ianto. His hands shook. Jack cursed himself; it was talking far too long for him to do this simple operation. “Ianto… don’t be dead.” _I can’t have you then lose you again._ Finally, somehow, he managed to calm himself enough to finish sedating the Weevil, get the clamps on its wrists, and the heavy bag over its head. All but kicking the creature away, he turned around to face his lover.

“Ianto!” Jack straddled Ianto’s thighs, dropped to his knees and then leaned over to rest his hands on the chilled concrete on either side of Ianto’s head. Dazed blue eyes stared up at him. The faintest of smiles curled those lips he so loved to kiss. Ianto shifted beneath him, chin lifting slightly, and veiled his eyes with his lashes. Unable to resist the silent invitation, Jack lowered his head and kissed the younger man, brushing their lips together and slowly deepening the kiss as Ianto’s arms came up to embrace him. He broke the kiss only when they both needed to breathe. “I thought I’d lost you again.”

“Still here.” Ianto’s breath caressed Jack’s skin. “You won’t lose me.”

Jack hummed softly, acknowledging the words; yet all he could truly hear was the sickening crunch as Ianto hit the concrete. He shifted his weight to rest more of it on his legs and left arm. He stroked Ianto’s face with the fingers of his right hand, hoping that Ianto didn’t feel him shaking. Sliding his hand beneath the other man’s head, he massaged Ianto’s scalp, tangling his fingers in his hair and sighed in relief when all he felt were the silken threads of Ianto’s hair. No blood oozed over his trembling fingers, though there was a solid lump on the back of Ianto’s head from his rather forceful meeting with the concrete floor.

Ianto’s hissing in pain froze Jack. He stared down into those storm-blue eyes and shook his head. “You scared me,” he murmured. “Reminded me of my nightmares from…” he trailed off, thrusting the words away from the front of his mind, and kissed Ianto hard instead. He was not going to allow that memory to mar his current happiness however brief it would turn out to be.

He shifted his weight again. Pressed close to the man beneath him and sank both hands into Ianto’s hair. He smothered any protest Ianto would have made in a deep, hungry kiss. Jack ravaged Ianto’s mouth, claiming him as his own again, and ignored press of Ianto’s hands against his chest in an abortive protest.

Jack tore his mouth from Ianto’s. He trailed open mouthed kisses along his jaw to Ianto’s throat, flicking his tongue along the edge of the starched collar, tasting the salt of Ianto’s sweat. He scraped his teeth over the pulse pounding beneath his lips, a moan of his own coming from his throat as Ianto arched against him in reaction, grinding their already hard cocks together. Jack reached for the fly of Ianto’s trousers only to feel his wrists grabbed, his hands held still.

“Jack, don’t,” Ianto gasped out on panted breath. “Not here. It’s cold and hard. And the Weevil…”

“Yes, here. Now,” he insisted, twisting his hands out of the loose hold and catching Ianto’s hands in his own. Jack pulled Ianto’s hands up, pinned them to the floor, and shifted to lay flat on top of the Welshman. He ground against the younger man and bit at Ianto’s pulse. “I need you, Ianto.” He lifted his head to stare deep into Ianto’s eyes. “Let me…” He freed one hand, stroking his fingers over Ianto’s shirt and further down to cup his erection through the woolen trousers.

“Jack!” Ianto gasped.

He grinned. God, did he love getting that particular strangled sound out of Ianto. With swift, practiced motions, he unbuckled Ianto’s belt, tugging the thick leather out of his way to flick open the button, unzip the trousers and wrap his questing fingers around the thick length of Ianto’s cock. He freed Ianto’s other hand and moved down Ianto’s body.

It was but a few moments work to free Ianto’s cock, already hard and leaking, from the confines of his clothes. Jack stroked the throbbing length and licked his lips, relishing the velvety hard weight in his hand. He glanced up at Ianto’s face, then lowered his head and swallowed him down. Jack wrapped a hand around the base of Ianto’s cock and sucked him, hard and greedy, desperate for the taste of his lover. Ianto’s hands tangled his hair, held him steady, in order to thrust up into his mouth. Jack hummed around his mouthful, delighting in the moans and gasps falling from Ianto’s lips.

Jack lifted his head and blew a soft breath over the heated flesh he held. He fisted Ianto roughly, growling throatily, “Come for me.” He lowered his head, relaxed his throat and took Ianto’s cock deep, sucking hard and tonguing the heavy vein on the underside. Ianto’s hands clenched in his hair, the sharp pain just adding to Jack’s own arousal, and he groaned deep in his throat. Ianto’s scream of his name echoed and reechoed in the cavernous warehouse while Jack drank down every drop of the younger man’s release. Only when Ianto was a panting, limp wreck beneath him did Jack pull away, resting his cheek on Ianto’s thigh and panting to catch his breath.

They lay in silence for several minutes. Ianto’s fingers threading through Jack’s hair while he, himself, purred softly in response. Only the sudden shifting and grunting of the Weevil broke the moment. Jack moved to kneel between Ianto’s sprawled legs, tucked him away, and fixed Ianto’s clothes as best he could before rising to offer Ianto a hand up. “We should go.”

**Chapter Six**

While Ianto wrestled the Weevil down to the cells, Jack bounced into the Hub, quickly dismissing the team on his way through to his office. He needed a minute to bring his wildly swinging emotions back under control. _I almost lost him… again!_ Jack dropped bonelessly into his chair. _Hitting the concrete like that should have fractured his skull._ He reached over and yanked the bottom drawer of his desk open. He pulled out the bottle within, reached for a glass and poured himself a generous serving of the single malt. He tossed it back quickly, coughing slightly, and then poured another. He filled a glass for Ianto, setting it on the opposite side of the desk before blindly moving to put the bottle back in the drawer.

The bottle thumped against something and wobbled a bit rather than settling properly into place. Jack set his glass down, leaned over and peered into the drawer. All his hard won, and alcohol aided, composure fled at the sight of the items in the bottom of the drawer. Stacked one on top of the other, the pair of boxes taunted him with memories of the past, of how this was just a particularly vivid dream. His happiness fled, all his joy dissolving away, as he set aside the whiskey bottle to lift the boxes with trembling hands. The bottom one, slightly larger and flatter, he set on the desk, unopened, in favor of turning the other over and over in his hands.

The pale wooden box with its tiny gold latch quickly warmed in his hands. He fingered the latch for a moment, debated opening it to look at the contents, but he knew them by heart even after five billion years. He could still vividly remember snapping the box shut all those eons ago, shoving it into the drawer with the black velvet one, the one now sitting on his desk, and slamming the drawer shut while fumbling for his phone with his other hand. He’d broken down in tears, literally begged his old friend for help only to be denied; so he’d called someone else. _Never like to admit that it was John who took me from here, from all the memories and pain, but if I hadn’t called Hart… well…_ Jack shook the morbid thoughts away and, at the sound of Ianto’s footfalls on the stairs behind him, hastily shoved the unopened box into his great coat pocket.

He rose, shrugging out of the coat, and turned to hang it on the rack behind him. “Wondered where you were.” Jack looked over his shoulder at Ianto with a smile. “Found your present. It’s a bit late, but…”

“Jack.” Ianto’s voice, soft though it was, cut across Jack’s rambling speech and silenced him. “I know you’re upset about earlier, but I’m perfectly fine.”

Jack chuckled, ignoring Ianto’s words. He turned around and picked up the full glass off the desk. He held it in one hand and picked up the box in the other. “So, whiskey? Present?” He grinned widely. “Or me?”

“Well….” Ianto dragged the word out, turning the single syllable into a verbal caress. “I know which one you want me to choose, but I think I’ll take this instead.” Long elegant fingers plucked the flat black case from his fingers. He turned the box over in his hands as he perched on the side of the desk in what had become one of their favourite late night conversation positions.

Jack delighted in Ianto’s laugh, even as he pouted at him. He set the glass on the desk by Ianto’s hip and returned to his chair. He rolled it a bit closer to Ianto so he could stroke his fingers up and down the inseam of Ianto’s trousers. He laughed quietly when Ianto grabbed his wandering hand and placed it firmly on the desk with a stern glare. Jack settled comfortably in the chair and took up his own whiskey sipping at the drink while watching Ianto fondle the flat velvet box. “Going to open it?”

“I’m savoring the anticipation.” Ianto picked up his glass and took a drink. From the way the light refracted off the cut crystal, the younger man was shaking just a bit. “You never bought me a gift.”

“Maybe I should have,” Jack whispered. He set his glass aside, reached over and squeezed Ianto’s wrist. “There’s a hell of a lot of things I should have done.”

Jack took the glass from Ianto’s hand and set it on the desk beside his own. “Open it,” he commanded softly. “I want to…” he trailed off, unable to explain himself now. The hinge on the box gave a heavy metal screech of protest before snapping open with a firm click. Jack watched Ianto just stare into the box.

“The triquetra?” Ianto whispered, as if he was afraid the gift would disappear because he spoke about it. Those long pale fingers plucked one of the glittering gold cufflinks from the box. He held it between thumb and finger, repeatedly rolling the small bit of jewelry back and forth. “Jack, do you…?”

“I know.” Jack rose to his feet. He stepped around in front of Ianto and gently nudged his legs apart to stand between them. He caught Ianto’s hand in his, stilling the restless motion, and waited until Ianto looked up at him before murmuring softly, “I looked it up. And then I decided to get them for you.”

“Today…” He reached out and traced the design with one finger. “Tomorrow…” He looked back up at Ianto from where they were both watching his finger go around the filigree knot. “…And always.” Jack raised his hand to cup Ianto’s cheek, stroked his lips with his thumb, and slowly leaned forward to press their lips together.

It was Ianto who broke the gentle kiss by pulling back from Jack to put the jewelry away. He snapped the box shut and dropped it onto the desk. “Jack, we _have_ to talk. There’s things…”

“Shh.” Jack pressed his fingers against Ianto’s lips. “We can talk tomorrow. Tonight I want to make love to you the way I should have all those years ago.” He leaned in and kissed Ianto again. “Your place?” He put all his yearning and desire for Ianto into those two simple words. The smile he received was more than answer enough.

**Chapter Seven**

Jack wandered the upper gantry. He was bored. It was his ideal dream. A perfect world where his team was happy and not getting called out every few minutes, risking their lives for a population that would never know of their actions. His getting to go home with Ianto every night and sleep, or not sleep, in the young Welshman’s arm was just icing on the proverbial cake. And yet he was totally bored. He’d even finished the stacks of paperwork left cluttering his desk. He never finished his paperwork. Jack stalked into the hothouse, crossed his arms over his chest, and glared down at the team going about their daily lives on the main Hub floor.

He managed a soft laugh for Toshiko and her constant glance around to see if anyone was watching her surreptitiously work on wedding planning when she was supposed to be compiling data to add to her translation program. She was failing miserably but everyone was indulging her as it was only a month to the wedding. Ianto was even providing, what had he called it, wedding fairy services to help her have the perfect day.

Owen and Katie were currently snuggling on the couch and feeding each other bits of their lunches. It was almost nauseatingly cute, but damn if it wasn’t good to see Owen finally happy. Katie - God, what to think about her - for such an ordinary woman, she was amazingly accepting of aliens and everything else that being a part of Torchwood entailed. Tommy had his experiences from before to fall back on; she’d never even known what was happening to her, but here she was as much a part of the team as any of the rest.

And then there was Ianto. Jack’s eyes scanned the Hub until he found the young Welshman standing just behind Toshiko’s shoulder. He was pointing something out on the monitor. Whatever it had been, he received a brilliant smile in return. Jack watched Ianto wander across the Hub, bending to straighten things up as he went. Jack had to ease the sudden tightening of his trousers in response to the sight of Ianto’s perfect ass in those amazingly well fitted pinstriped trousers.

It was all too perfect. It couldn’t be real. He couldn’t be here with his team. It was just too damned perfect. He dropped his head and squeezed his eyes shut. He ignored the tears which rolled down his cheeks. _Why are you torturing me like this? Why let me see them happy only to tear them away from me again? Why give me this time with Ianto only to rip him from my arms again?_ Jack knew he’d get no answers to his desperate questions, but he asked them anyway. The sound of the door opening beside him brought his head up.

“Are you alright?” Ianto stepped into the room. He shook his head. “You’ve been crying again. Of course you’re not alright.”

“It’s too perfect, Ianto,” Jack murmured, gesturing toward the windows. He knew Ianto wanted to talk about something, something related to this experience; however, Jack refused to allow him to even start the conversation, too afraid the words to come were a goodbye in preparation of sending him away. Jack kept talking and ignored Ianto’s frustration with him. “This. You. All of it. It’s too damned perfect.” He chuckled, the sound bitter even to himself, and shook his head. “And I’m bored. We never had this long without something happening, even if it was just a bunch of alien sightseers, but now… nothing’s happening and it’s boring.”

As if on cue, the glaring claxon of a rift alert echoed through the Hub. As he watched, Ianto rolled his eyes and muttered something in Welsh, even as he turned to open the door for Jack. Jack ran out, bounded down the steps, and skidded to a halt behind Toshiko. “What’ve we got?”

“Rift activity.” Tosh leaned her head back to look up at him. “Car park in the city centre.”

Jack scanned the readings and blinked. _Can’t be. What the hell is he doing here?_ He looked up, took in the expectant looks from the team and just snapped. There was no way in hell he was allowing any of them near the bastard. Not this time. He turned away from Toshiko’s desk with a barely audible snarl. He grabbed his coat and pointed in the general direction of the team. “Stay here. Don’t come after me.”

Jack ran out the door headed straight for the SUV. Even has the cog door rolled back into place behind him, he could hear Ianto giving orders to the team, for Tosh to track him and them to gather weapons. He flipped his wrist strap open and pressed a few buttons forcing a command level lockdown onto the Hub. It would take Toshiko a bit to break through the codes. Plenty of time for him to get rid of the bastard while keeping the team safe. He sped off in the SUV, already knowing where to go, and ignored the soft beeping of his vortex manipulator.

**Chapter Eight**

With a screech of brakes, Jack pulled the SUV to a halt before the same bar he’d met John in the first time around. He parked, pulled the keys out and jumped from the vehicle. A slam of the door behind him and he started across the street into the emptied building. He pulled his pistol, holding it loosely in one hand, and shoved the doors open. Jack stalked down into the club more than ready for anything he might discover inside.

He shoved the inner doors open and kept walking. As had happened before, John stalked toward him. The two of them meeting in front of the plasma screen television, but Jack pressed his free hand to John’s chest, holding him back when the other man moved to kiss him. “You need to go.”

“What?”

“I want you gone.” Jack pushed John back a few steps and circled around him. “I don’t want you here.” He paused, swallowed, resolutely shoved away a lifetimes worth of memories, and then continued. “I don’t want you.”

“Time was you couldn’t get enough of me.”

“I’ve changed. You’ve changed.” Jack ducked his head and glanced away for a moment. He couldn’t allow himself to react to John or the memories that the other man stirred within him. There had been some good times, some good memories, but only one truly good thing had come of his years with John. That was then, though, and there was nothing John could offer him that could trump spending another moment in Ianto’s warm embrace. He brought his pistol up and pressed the barrel against John’s chest. “Go. Now.”

“Really?” John gave him an appraising look. “I could…”

“Just go,” Jack murmured. Despite everything, that one good thing wouldn’t allow him to kill his old partner. He put the safety on the gun and slowly lowered it. “Please, just…”

“Jack…” The purring tone gave away John’s thoughts, his assurance of victory over Jack’s connections to Cardiff and the twenty-first century. “Just imagine what we could do. Between our training and your rather unique condition, we could make a fortune.” John took a step closer to him. “Besides, you owe me.”

_"Jack? Everything okay?”_ Ianto’s voice echoed hollowly across the comm system. Those rolling Welsh vowels combined with the heavy weight of that wooden box still hidden away in his pocket reminded Jack of everything he stood to lose if he gave into temptation. _“We’re on our way.”_

He reached up, pressing the comm. _“Everything’s fine. Go ahead and send the others home.”_ He pressed the unit again, disconnecting himself from the system, and licked his lips. Jack took a step closer to John, lowering his head to murmur softly to the brunette. “I do owe you. For saving me, twice, and finding Gray…” Jack paused, “but even with all that, it’s only because of Kerensa that I don’t eliminate you.” He pressed the briefest of kisses to John’s lips. Then, he resolutely stalked past the other man.

“Don’t you walk away from me,” John snarled.

The rasp of plastic on leather warned Jack. He whirled in place, dropped to one knee and fired all in one single fluid move. He shifted his aim at the absolute last moment, but still struck his target. “I told you to leave, John. There’s nothing here for you.” He rose to his feet again, shoving his coat back to rest his hands on his hips, and tilted his head in the general direction of the Hub. “I have too damned much to lose if I spend even a moment longer with you.”

Jack gave a final nod of goodbye and left the building. He honestly didn’t give a damn if John stayed on Earth or left for another century. He wanted nothing more to do with the ex-Time Agent. He was going to find his Welshman, grab him and hold on for however long they had left before this delightful dream was over.

He got outside and froze. For several minutes, all he could do was stare at the man leaning back against the SUV. Jack’s eyes took in that familiar form. Short dark hair, big ears, blue eyes, and a black leather coat. It may have been eons, but he still remembered this man. He took a deep breath, letting it out slowly, and crossed the street. He shoved his hands into his pockets and curled his fingers around the box inside the one. “Why are you here?”

“You know why.” His delivery was harsh, as clipped as it always had been, and Jack automatically flinched in response to it. He straightened away from the car and gestured toward the nearby alley. “Come on then.”

“Explain it to me.” Jack started to follow out of long established habit. Only the sight of the TARDIS tucked up into the shadows of the alley caused him to stop dead in his tracks. “Because I’m not getting it.”

“Tell me… do you really think you belong here? In this place? This time?” The Doctor turned to face him. There was a haunted look in the Time Lord’s eyes. “It’s different, isn’t it? Subtle changes from the familiar. Things niggling at you until you just know this isn’t where you belong.”

“What else?” Jack clenched his hand around the box in his pocket. His mind turned to Ianto, likely waiting patiently for him back at the Hub, and he clenched his jaw. “What else are you going to take away from me? Haven’t I done enough? Am I ever going to be good enough to suit you?”

“You don’t belong here, Captain.” The Doctor crossed his arms over his chest and tucked his hands beneath his jacket. Despite the harsh words, there was a hint of sympathy in the other man’s eyes. “You know I’m right.”

“Doctor, I…” Jack broke off, squeezing his hand tighter around the box hidden in his pocket. He found that he couldn’t not listen to the Time Lord; he’d spent far too long as the other’s loyal soldier to disobey now. Even if it broke what little of his heart remained intact after five billion years alone. He leant his head back and squeezed his eyes shut. He could cry later when he was alone. He dropped his head, swallowed hard. He then nodded and moved to join the Time Lord. “I know,” he whispered. He didn’t even attempting to hide the searing pain tearing through his body as he spoke.

“Now get in the TARDIS.”

**Epilogue**

Ianto huddled within his heavy coat. He hunched his shoulders against the chill breeze blowing in off the bay and gave himself one moment to indulge his emotions. He had to let them out at least once before returning to the Hub. Here, on one of Jack’s favorite rooftops, he knew he’d be able to give vent to his feelings without worrying the team, especially Tosh. If he broke down like this in front of her, who knew what would happen.

He let the tears flow. He hadn’t felt pain like this since Lisa had left to rejoin the Cyberman Army. For one glorious week, he’d had everything he could ever have wanted – Jack, in his home, his arms, his bed – but he also knew that it wasn’t his choice. Jack had to make the decision to stay with him. Obviously, since his tracker had disappeared from the system at the same moment that the energy signal for the TARDIS had, Jack had gone off traveling the universe again. Ianto couldn’t begrudge him, despite feeling as if Jack had taken his heart and soul with him.

He sighed, pulled his hands from his pockets and fingered the gold filigree cufflinks Jack had given him. Ianto looked up at the sky, silently promising himself that nothing else mattered, even his own loneliness, as long as Jack was happy, wherever he was. “Beunydd, Cariad,” he murmured. “Beunydd.”

“I’ll hold you to that.”

A pair of arms circled his waist and pulled him back against a very familiar body. Ianto tensed for a moment, startled, and then relaxed back against Jack. He leant his head back against Jack’s shoulder and smiled. “I didn’t know you knew Welsh.”

“I lived here for more than a hundred years.” Jack’s voice was soft, his breath a warm caress over Ianto’s cool skin. “I picked up a few things.”

They stood in silence for a while and watched Myfanwy circle the bay. The pteranodon’s screeches occasionally broke the pre-dawn silence which hung over the Plass. Finally, as the sun crested the horizon, Ianto felt Jack shift behind him.

“It’s only been a year for you, but eons for me.” After a moment, Jack’s hand reappeared in front of him holding a small honey-oak box. “When I found this in my desk, I promised myself no more doubts or regrets.”

“Jack?” Ianto took a step away from Jack in order to turn and face him. He stared at the older man for a long moment. Then he took the box from Jack’s hand, opened it, and felt his jaw drop in shock. “Jack, are these what I think they are?”

Jack didn’t answer him. At least not verbally, instead, his captain reached out and plucked one of the rings from inside the box and offered it to him. “Having found you again, I’m not going to take the chance of possibly losing you without you knowing exactly what you mean to me.”

Ianto stared in shock. He couldn’t speak. He looked from the ring to Jack and back. Then he silently offered Jack his hand.

“I pledge to love you forever…” Jack’s lips twitched slightly as he spoke. Ianto wondered about the almost laugh and resolved to ask in the future. “To be open, honest and faithful to you. I promise to comfort and challenge you. And I promise to stand with you as we share this life and cherish the memories we make together.” Jack lifted his hand, kissed Ianto’s fingers just above the last knuckle then slipped the ring into place.

Ianto swallowed. It took him a solid minute to get his mind working again. The declarations Jack had just spoken had so thrown him. He blinked and then blinked again. He took his ring’s mate from the box and dropped the box onto the roof. It was no longer important. “' _Ti yw f'enaid i. Dw i’n dy garu di, Cariad_ ,” he murmured, sliding the ring onto Jack’s offered hand. He clasped their hands together, brought his other hand up and sank his fingers into Jack’s hair. Ianto pulled the other man to him and kissed him deeply. Now, his perfect dream could become their true reality.


End file.
